Wednesday, April 1, 2009

The Arrival

It came today.  Jordan's release letter.
We've known this day was coming since before Christmas.  We've just been waiting, waiting, and waiting. Jordan's company has been bought out by Altria and his job has been eliminated.

I will confess:  I'm not good at waiting.  I do not like the not knowing.  I like having a plan and a backup plan.  So, it's been a L O N G 4 months.  
We know that God is in control of even this.  We know that he will provide.  That being said, some days are easier than others. You see, I'm just stubborn that way.  God has never let me down.  He's always shown up.  I don't need to look any further than my 3 children to know this is true. I know His way is the best way. Yet, I constantly struggle with worrying, trying to do things on my own, doing things my way, instead of just getting out of the way and trusting God to do it. 

When we first learned of the possibility of the buy out, we were actually excited thinking it's a blessing in disguise to get back "home"-Arkansas. You see, we've been in North Carolina since Kennedy was 2 1/2, and I was 5 months pregnant with Jackson.  And of course, 12 1/2 months after Jackson was born, Chandler Grace made her debut.  So, our babies/family don't really know each other.  This is heartbreaking for all of us.

It's funny how God can use any circumstance and does.  Let me just say I wasn't thrilled to move here-did I say I was 5 months pregnant??!!  To be perfectly honest, I hated this place for over 2 years. It had nothing to do with our town.  It is on Lake Norman, a beautiful water community, with mountains or beaches just 4 hours away.  It had more to do with the fact it was 12-14 hours away from our family. 
But, this move has been paramount for my faith.  Away from the "bubble" of Christian surroundings I had been co-dependent on, I was forced to start over and find an authentic relationship with God.  We have become plugged in with a church home we love and I am already saddened to think of leaving it.  It has been a refuge for me and a place I believe God led me to.  So, in some respects, I feel like a new Christian. A little scared to leave, but, knowing that I take Him with me wherever I go.

Jordan has interviews being set up and we are praying for God's purpose for our lives.  We hope that we can get back close to Arkansas and be a part of our family's lives.  
The reality of this has set in, so to speak, and we are constantly reminding ourselves and each other of God's promises as we are in this sea of uncertainty. He will not abandon us.  This verse has been read by me more times than I can count for months now.  What encouragement in times such as these.  Please pray for us!

"But these things I plan won't happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, be patient! For it will surely take place. It will not be late by a single day." Habakkuk 2:3


Danna Ramsey said...

Honey, I am praying for you! I know huge blessings are in store.

Karen said...

I am praying for you and your beautiful family. There are so many people in your situation, it could be my family next. Scary, but God is in control!

April said...

You are right in reminding all of us that God is always in control. Easier said than done, right?! Know that we are praying for your whole family as you take each day one step at a time down the path that God already has planned for you. He has paved the way. We will pray that it is a smooth path for you!

JoEllyn said...

I will be praying!

Collins Family said...

Oh Kim I am so sorry and you know I am here we have been in this boat for over a year and I know how hard it is and yes scary. I also have trouble letting God take control of the situation and I have trouble being patient. I am here if you need a shoulder to cry on ( I know I need one at times) or someone to listen to you get angry ( I definitely do that I get so frustrated that jobs are not working out and we have no $$$ to pay our bills) Girl I am just here for you and praying.

abc said...

Oh, Kim, I'm so sorry. You have such a great perspective on this. I know as you know that God WILL see this through. Thanks for this great scripture- what a jewel. You are all in my prayers.

Dallas said...

Oh Kim, I am praying for you! I know you are giving it all to God and He will bless you! We would love to have you in Northwest much fun would that be!

Whitney said...

I'm definitely praying that God opens up a door for you guys, and that you open your hearts to his will! Keep us posted.

April Kay said...

Wow, Kim, I have goosebumps right now at the thought of y'all getting to move back to your family! How WONDERFUL would that be!??!?! I will pray hard for you! And specifically for Jordan's job search. I know it's so hard to not know what your next step is, but also exciting to see what God has in store! Love you girl!